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| Top 10 Places to Sex It Up... |
| 11.24.04 (1:01 pm) [edit] |
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My Top 10 places I Fantisize about Having Sex
10. Movie Theatre, Back Seat
09. Drive In Movie
08. waterfall (somewhere really really HOT)
07. an upscale restaurant bathroom stall (blame this one on the movie Unfaithful)
06. a Park while having a picnic
05. In the Ocean
04. In my office at work (under my desk would be nice)
03. On my kitchen floor
02. the Space needle
01. Nude Beach (preferably i Jamaica, Greece, Or Tahiti)
Care to share your top 10??
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| Sexy Fun Tip ~ Pool Party |
| 11.24.04 (12:30 pm) [edit] |
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Get one of those little kiddie pools. Pour mineral/baby oil into the pool making sure the entire bottom of it is covered with oil, then get your boo and you into it for a little sexy wrestling. It won't be long before you end up having a very good sex session that is also a lot of fun. The ONLY problem is that latex CONDOMS and baby oil just do not mix!! It's fine if you use one of the non-latex condoms other wise you'd have to get some other type of oil (I was thinking of Sweet Almond Oil or an even cheaper alternative, sunflower oil or some other cooking oil - EASY GLIDE is too expensive.)
The pool idea was cool for me as I have wrecked a few sheets with that damn oil. This way I could put the pool on a drop cloth or something and get my groove on and have a little fun to boot!
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| Computer Expert |
| 11.24.04 (10:46 am) [edit] |
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| Female Ejaculation |
| 11.24.04 (10:44 am) [edit] |
the "other" female orgasm
Different techniques will accomplish different things. We all know about the clitoris and the effects of stimulating it, but the G-spot is
not clear to everybody - men as well as women. Here is a different
technique to accomplish some different orgasms. Orgasms that not every woman is aware of and that - as a result - may bring about some very intense emotions. Few men know about it, more women do but most either don't know what to do with it or feel ashamed about it: female ejaculation. Not all women can do it and the way they do (and the amount of fluid they produce) may be very different. The amount of fluid may vary from just a few drops to a mug full(a cup fool makes for a great taste). You need a little technique to get it done, but first you need to understand it. Understand my brothers and sisters.
Female ejaculate is worked up in the spongy area around the female
urethra, better known as the G-spot. It's located at the upper part of the vagina, just behind the entrance at the back of the pubic bone. A woman or girl may have trouble finding it because it is not an easy spot to locate by yourself, but your partner will almost immediately identify it because it actually feels like a little sponge. When stimulated, this
little sponge will fill itself with fluid. To the novice woman, the
first time she ejaculates feels like she is letting her urine flow because
it originates almost from the same area. Don't worry, it's impossible to urinate while having an orgasm (the urethra will temporarily close up) so whatever it is you're doing, it's not urinating.
Currently there is a theory that the G-spot is just the back end of
the clitoris inside the woman’s body. This is quite possibly true, and
the stroking of the G-spot is just massaging the back end of the
clitoris. Regard less it is a very erotic and pleasant feeling for the
recipient.
The clitoris is such a special organ, as it has only one function, and
that is to supply pleasure to the woman’s body. The clitoris contains
one thousand times as many nerve endings as the penis. Men should think about that and realise how wonderful they can make a woman feel by paying attention to the wonderful excited clitoris.
The G-spot
The G-spot is an area 1 to 1.5 inches across and located about two
finger joints deep into the vaginal entrance. Its sensitivity to
stimulation was first discovered by Ernest GrŠaefenberg (1881-1957 - the G-spot is named after him) in 1950. As a result of direct stimulation the spot, which works like a sponge, will fill itself with fluid. To date it's unknown specifically what these fluids are, from where exactly they originate or what their exact function is. However, they're neither urine nor vaginal fluids and have no lubricating effect. A G-spot orgasm, combined with ejaculation, is much like the male orgasm, including the physical fatigue and the need for a refractory period. The ejaculate will come out in different flows - different women have different numbers of flows and the amount of ejaculate is very individually determined. Science has different opinions on the question if all women have a G-spot and if all are able to ejaculate.
Stimulating the G-spot to the level where it will ejaculate requires
three major items: time, tender play and (usually, but certainly not
always) vaginal fisting. What you do is this: you start with stimulating
the G-spot (which to some women is even more exciting than stimulating the clitoris) with your fingers and slowly and tenderly work your way to the point where you can slip your hand into the vagina (wear latex gloves at all times, not only to protect yourself but also to protect the tender inner vaginal tissue, and use lots and lots of lubricant). A good tip when you're using lubricant in and around the vagina is to warm it slightly before applying it. It's cold as it comes straight out of the dispenser, which to most women is very uncomfortable on the warm, tender and highly stimulated vagina. Simply have the dispenser ready, but floating in a bowl of warm water so it will warm up while you're playing.
Once you're in, stimulate and stimulate and stimulate (literally pump
up the volume) until you feel the vaginal muscles contracting around
your wrist (the first sign of an orgasm coming up). That is the signal to change position. Leave four fingers in the vagina and lay your thumb
over the clitoris. Now simply squeeze the G-spot from behind and - like you were pressing an orange or a lemon - you'll squeeze out the liquid.
Whatever you do now: DON'T STOP! The orgasm will not only be very, very, very intense, it will also revolve. Let it come and come and come again until your partner asks you to stop. This revolving orgasm may very well last for ten to fifteen minutes. Squeeze out the liquid, ease up a little and when the next wave comes up, squeeze again. There is more to come.
Useful tips:
1. If you're into bondage, then by all means tying someone down can
add another dimension to this. The movements will be extremely strong, unexpected, uncontrolled and sometimes can be spasmodic. This really will be an orgasm like she's never had before.
2. Spread the bed with lots and lots of towels, because you don't know
how much fluid may come out, but there's a fair chance it will easily
fill up two or three layers of towels. Men think this cant happen, ask some women and they will tell you it can. (have fun, be explorative and please her what you put into it is what you get out of it).
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| Confused?? Help |
| 11.24.04 (10:08 am) [edit] |
When I first transferred to the department I currently work in I encountered something I've never EVER heard of before.
There were 4 gay people in the department. 1 woman and 3 men. Well one of the guy's invited all of us to his home for a house warming party. I decided to go. While I was at his home I saw a photo of his family. The photo was of his parents and a little girl. I ask him if the photo was taken before he was born and he told me NO, that the girl in the photo was indeed HIM.
CONFUSION.
I stood there trying to figure this out for a while. I could care less that SHE is now a MAN, but what I have never figured out is why have a sex change to be a GAY man.
Wasn't she already fucking men?? I just don't get it...
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| Booty Call Commandments |
| 11.24.04 (10:04 am) [edit] |
I. Thou shalt get out before the sun rises
II. Thou shouldest never ask "can we see each other from now on?"
III. Thou shalt refrain from referring to our activities as "love making."
IV. Thou shalt not request advanced plans.
V. Thou shalt kiss anything except my mouth.
VI. Thou shalt scream my name often
VII. If someone cometh over whilst thou art here, thou art my cousin from out of town.
VIII.Thou shalt not ask me to walk thee to thy car. Don't thou knoweth what it looketh like?
IX. There shall be no "pillow talk."
X. There shall be no cuddling - ever!
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| 2 Minute Man - Here's Help |
| 11.19.04 (3:54 pm) [edit] |
For a man who wants to learn how to perform Kegels, the first step is locating the Kegel muscle. Here's how: Some time when he has the urge to urinate, he should sit on the toilet with his legs spread, start to urinate, then try to stop the flow. (The PC muscle is the one he squeezes to do this.) After restarting the flow, he can practice stopping and restarting the stream of urine. It may take several attempts to actually isolate the PC muscle--the buttocks muscles have a tendency to kick in if the legs aren't kept wide. When a man has familiarized himself with the sensation of contracting the PC muscle, he's ready to practice holding the contractions. He should first try holding a contraction for several seconds three or four times a day.
Over the next few weeks, as he continues doing Kegels, he can
gradually increase the time of the contraction until he is holding it for 10 to 15 seconds. Next, he should alternate these Kegel holds with a series of short, quick contractions. It is recommended that men gradually work up to a daily routine of 100 quick PC contractions and five holds. (Women who want to learn how to do Kegels should follow these same steps, but they only need to do the long holds for five seconds; men, however, need the 10- to 15-second hold for delaying ejaculation.)
After a few months of diligent practice, a man should be ready to try using the Kegel hold during intercourse to delay ejaculation. But first he must familiarize himself with the sensation known as ejaculatory inevitability--the point at which he can no longer hold back an ejaculation. He will feel an uncontrollable urge to ejaculate as his prostate gland and seminal vesicles contract. Once a man has developed an awareness of this sensation, he can then learn to produce a PC contraction before he reaches that point of no return.
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| Licking Coochie |
| 11.19.04 (3:35 pm) [edit] |
Cunnilingus is one of the surest ways to sexually pleasure a woman. And why wouldn’t it be? Your tongue and lips are soft, warm, wet, and gentle. It can twist and flick in ways your fingers could only dream of. Burying your face in a woman’s vulva is about as intimate as relations get, and your hands are free to attend to her other needs. So yes, most women love oral sex – if it’s done right, that is. Unfortunately, it often isn’t. With this in mind, here are some tips on how to perform mind-blowing cunnilingus.
The first thing to remember is that all women are different. Yes, all of them. Period. So if you’ve had a previous partner who told you that you had a tongue of gold, don’t get cocky; you’re going to have to re-learn for every woman. This is good because it will force you to go slowly and communicate – two things you ought to be doing anyway. Listen to your partner’s breathing. Is she breathing deeply? Is she relaxed? Is there a quick inhale when you kiss her just so? Is she starting to get a little breathless? Very breathless? Watch for her body language. What’s her expression like? Is she pressing her body closer to your face? Are her legs starting to shake? Is she thrusting her hips? Don’t fight her; follow her lead and adapt to her rhythm.
There are thousands of ways to know if your partner is enjoying herself. One of the best is to encourage her to tell you what she does and doesn’t like. Make sure she’s comfortable telling you simple things like softer, faster, and keep going – and make sure you’re comfortable hearing them. Women will sense your discomfort if it’s there.
Healthy vaginas taste good to most people, or at worst, are a quickly acquired taste. If you are among the unlucky few who don’t like the flavour, there are a few things you can do. First, use a dental dam, as is recommended in the first place. Second, suggest a shower together beforehand, as a recent wash will weaken the flavour. And third, you can buy any number of flavoured products, such as creams, to make your partner taste like whatever you want. Just be absolutely certain you don’t expose the vagina to sugar. This can cause a yeast infection, which won’t help the taste at all.
Cunnilingus is most commonly performed with the woman lying on her back (try putting a pillow under her hips), and her partner either lying on her/his stomach between the woman’s legs, or kneeling on the floor with the woman on the edge of the bed or a chair. In the interests of giving the receiving woman more control, she may wish to kneel over her partner’s face as s/he lies on her/his back, but not all women find this position comfortable. Some couples prefer the receiving woman on her back, with the performing partner lying over her, face-down, in a 69 position. Experiment and find out what works best for you.
It is important to go slowly, especially at the beginning. You are not in a race to get to her clitoris, nor is she in a race to reach orgasm. Get into a very comfortable position, and have pillows nearby. Hold her hand. Try teasing her stomach with feathery kisses as your fingertips lightly brush over her nipples on their way down the length of her body. Lick the backs of her knees, nibble around her hipbones, trace your tongue over the insides of her thighs, kiss the crease where her legs meet her body. Nuzzle your lips, nose, and chin into her outer labia (the larger set of lips, the ones with hair follicles). Reach out with the tip of your tongue and slowly, delicately lick from the base of her vagina up over its opening, past her urethra and clitoris, up to the top of her labia. Do it again, slower. Use your tongue to gently probe into her vagina, and to explore up and down her inner labia. You don’t need to attack her clitoris yet – be a tease.
Meanwhile, use your hands. Reach up and under her thighs to squeeze her buttocks, move your hands over her stomach or sides, caress her breasts, or stroke the insides of her legs. Run your fingers up through her pubic hair; this feels nice for her, and will also remove any loose hairs so they won’t get in your mouth.
Kiss, suck, and nibble at her inner and outer labial lips. Try tugging gently on the latter with your fingers now and again. Remember: all women are different, so you’ll need to pay close attention to your partner’s response to find out what she likes. Spend lots of time on the whole area between her legs. When you can hear her breathing getting deep and intense, if she’s giving little moans or whimpers, or if she’s arching her back and pushing her pelvis towards your face, she’s ready for more.
You may have trouble finding her clitoris, since the area will become engorged with blood (much like with men, for those of you familiar with penises), and the surrounding flesh may obscure it. Don’t give up. Lick her vulva from bottom to top again, and on the way up, you should feel a bump. If you don’t, try again. And again. When you hear her suddenly sigh, you’ve probably found it. If she’s extremely turned on, the clitoral hood will have retracted. If it hasn’t, don’t immediately push it up. Many clitorises are too sensitive to be touched directly. You’ll have to take your cue from her: if she shows that she wants more intense stimulation, lift the hood; if not, rest assured that she’ll still feel your tongue’s effects through it. Meanwhile, don’t forget to let her know how much you’re enjoying yourself.
After finding your partner’s clitoris, you’re now in a position to worship it. Something as simple as licking from just beneath it up to its top (you’ll be able to feel the ridge and change in texture of her flesh at this point) with your tongue relaxed as you would with an ice cream is highly pleasurable when repeated. The pressure you apply here is critical. Remember: the clitoris has a higher concentration of nerves than any other part of your partner’s body. You do not need to wrestle with it. You do not need to try to push it into her pelvic bone. You do not need to violently swirl your tongue around like a mad person. You need to lick it firmly, but gently. Trust your partner to tell or show you what she wants; women know what they like. Holding one of her hands is a great communication tool. She can squeeze or rub your hand to indicate what she likes or at what speed she wants you to move. And if you notice her hand start to sweat a little, you can guess that she’s getting pretty excited.
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| Sexual Trivia |
| 11.19.04 (3:31 pm) [edit] |
1. The left testicle usually hangs lower than the right for right-handed men. The opposite is true for lefties. (Could it be all that ball grabbing they do?)
2. The first known contraceptive was crocodile dung, used by the Egyptians in 2000 B.C. It was replaced with elephant droppings when they realized it wouldn't work. (Thank heaven for condoms!)
3. In earlier times, virginity on one's wedding night was of the greatest importance. To prove that the bride was a virgin, it was customary that the couple would display the bloodstained bedsheet for all to see once the wedding was consummated. (Now that's just nasty!)
4. The initial spurt of ejaculate travels at 28 miles per hour. By way of comparison, the world record for the 100 yard dash is 27.1 miles per hour.
5. It's been estimated that one out of every two hundred women is born with an extra nipple. (Does that mean that having their titties sucked turns them on more? If so, how can I get one?)
6. It's been estimated that the practice of autoerotic asphyxiation (temporarily suffocating yourself while masturbating) takes the lives of 250 to a thousand people each year. I guess going blind is the least of your worries.
7. In 1995, Mo Ka Wang, a Chi Kung master in Hong Kong, lifted over 250 pounds of weight two feet off the floor with his erect penis.
8. One of the reasons male deer rub their antlers on a tree or the ground is to masturbate.
9. An unobstructed penis is capable of shooting semen anywhere from 12 to 24 inches.
10. Micropenis is a rare disorder where the afflicted suffers from an unusually small penis, roughly .75 to one inch long...and that's erect.
11. Black women are 50% more likely than white women to have an orgasm when they have sex. (Let the church say "Amen!" )
12. Women who respond to sex surveys in magazines have had five times as many lovers as non-respondents.
13. A man's testicles increase in size by 50% when he is aroused.
14. It takes a sperm one hour to swim seven inches.
15. An agalmatophiliac is someone who has a fetish for statues or mannequins. These people tend to have an uncontrollable desire to masturbate whenever they see a nude mannequin.
16. Oneirogmophobia is the fear of wet dreams.
17. The smallest erect penis on record was one centimeter long. (I have no comment.)
18. The first "official" vasectomy was performed in 1893.
19. At age seventy, 73% of men are still potent. (So there is hope for old age.)
20. Oculolinctus is a fetish whereby people are sexually aroused by licking a partner's eyeball. A word of caution if you want to try this: oral herpes can be transferred to the eye.
21. Homosexuality remained on the American Psychiatric Association's list of mental illnesses until 1973.
22. Believe it or not, there's actually a word for the fear of seeing, thinking about, or having an erect penis. It's called ithyphallophobia.
23. While nudity was considered commonplace to the ancient Greeks, a man was considered indecent if he had an exposed erection.
24. The most successful X-rated movie of all time is Deep Throat. It cost less than $50,000 to make it and has earned more than $100 million. (DAYUM! I am in the wrong business!)
25. Among transsexuals who choose sex-change operations, females who elect to become males are reportedly happier and better adjusted after the procedures than males who elect to become female.
26. Sperm banks keep their donor semen at approximately -321 degrees Fahrenheit. At that temperature, it could be kept indefinitely.
27. A survey conducted by Masters and Johnson in the early 1980s revealed that the third-most frequent fantasy amongst both homosexual men and women was a heterosexual encounter.
28. Compulsive or pathological sexual behavior have a 12-step program available to them through SLAA, the Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous.
29. It's been said that Adolph Hitler was a coprophiliac, which means he had a fetish for women's feces. He also had a thing for being urinated on by women.
30. The usual result of ingesting Spanish Fly is vomiting.
31. Exhibitionists are most likely to be married men.
32. The male fetus is capable of attaining an erection during the last trimester.
33. The same chemical responsible for the ecstatic highs of love and sexual attraction, phenylethylamine, is also found in chocolate. (No wonder so many sisters love chocolate and it is the gift of choice for Valentine's Day. It is edible foreplay.)
34. According to statistics, Australian women are the most likely to have sex on the first date.
35. The name of Wyoming's Grand Teton peak literally means "big tit."
36. Studies have proven that it's harder to tell a convincing lie to someone you find sexually attractive.
37. Semen contains small amounts of more than thirty elements, including fructose, ascorbic acid, cholesterol, creatine, citric acid, lactic acid, nitrogen, vitamin B12, and various salts and enzymes.
38. Women who went to college are more likely than high school dropouts to enjoy both the giving and receiving of oral sex. (That's because of all the frat parties. You didn't know?)
39. A "buckle bunny" is a woman who goes to rodeos with the express intent of having sex with a rodeo cowboy. (Interesting. They probably do know how to get buck wild though.)
40. Menstrual cramps have been known, in rare cases, to induce orgasms. (Most women are also the most horny during their mentrual cycles as well.)
41. Studies show that, for some unknown reason, the higher the level of education, the more men tend to have wet dreams.
42. Studies have shown that men become sexually aroused nearly every time they dream.
43. Women say that the part of a man's body that they admire the most is his buttocks.
44. According to a recent survey, more Americans lose their virginity in June than any other month. ( That's because a lot of teenagers lose their virginity in cars and it is too cold to get busy in the winter.)
45. Women who are housewives are, as a whole, more faithful than working women. (That's only because they interact with less men.)
46. Besides the genitals and the breasts, the inner nose is the only other body part that routinely swells during intercourse.
47. According to Playboy, the most popular sexual aid is erotic literature. (I really need a career change)
48. A small flaccid penis generally has a greater percentage increase during erection than a larger flaccid penis
49. The most recorded orgasms in an hour by researchers at the Center for Marital and Sexual Studies in Long Beach, CA, was 134 by one female and sixteen for a male. (HELL I NEED TO TO TO THIS INSTITUTE DIZAMMMMMM!)
50. The average bra is designed to last for only 180 days of use. (So that really means we only need to purchase two bras a year to get by. Better not let Victoria's Secret find out.)
51. A study of pet owners found that 66% claimed they allowed their pets to remain in the bedroom during intercourse.
52. Among primates, man has the largest and thickest penis. (I have to wonder who did the measurements and comparisons. They need help.)
53. According to recent surveys, the man is the most likely partner to be tied up during sex. (That's because most sisters are not going to trust a man enough to tie them up and most men think they can get loose if they have to.)
54. Somebody actually timed a rattlesnake mating session that lasted 22.75 hours. (Someone needs to get a life.)
55. According to Playboy, more women talk dirty during sex than men. (Not a surprise.)
56. There are five calories in a teaspoon of semen. (And they keep bragging on the Atkins Diet?... mmm lets start the semen diet heehee)
57. Medomalacuphobia is the fear of losing an erection. (Any woman that has ever dealt with a two-minute brother has medomalacuphobia.)
58. The Kama Sutra details techniques on ten types of kisses, 64 different caresses, eight variations on oral sex, and 84 positions for intercourse. (That is a whole lot of shit to learn and remember.)
59. The Kama Sutra was written by Mallanga Vatsyayana, who was rumored to be celibate. (Makes you wonder about those techniques, huh?)
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| 10 Things & More.... |
| 11.19.04 (3:07 pm) [edit] |
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10 Artists you've been listening a lot to lately:
1. Alicia Keys
2. Boney James
3. Xscape
4. Maxwell
5. Cierra
6. Missy Elliott
7. Alliyah
8. Lauren Hill
9. Jaheim
10. Jodeci
09 things you look forward to:
1. Finishing this damn nutrition program
2. Trip to the east coast
3. Getting results of all these tests so the docs will leave me be.
4. Brey's graduation
5. Traveling Traveling Traveling
6. Bush out of office
7. staying fit
8. catering full time
9. Summer of 2005
08 things you like to wear:
1. Donna Karan's Cashmere Mist
2. Red TH Windbreaker
3. K-Swiss tennis shoes
4. cute new sandals, with 5 inch heels
5. almost any red shirt
6. nice fitting demi cup bras
7. peach oil
8. Baby oil with aloe vera gel
07 people you want to spend more time with:
1. my mom
2. Breyahna
3. Mike
4. my sister Taryn
5. Ronnie
6. Mario
7. my dad
06 things you say most days:
1) "It's okay Tito"
2) "For real?"
3) "Well...."
4) "Do you, let me do me"
5) "______ is working my nerves"
6) "awwwww Shit!"
05 things you do everyday:
1. workout
2. Play msn games
3. Work AND work overtime
4. read everything from e-mail to discussion groups to journals
5. Masturbate
04 things that annoy you:
1. Liars - I like the truth no matter how fucked up it is
2. Predjudice
3. Cats and all that cat hair
4. whiners
03 movies you could watch over and over again:
1. ShawShank Redemption
2. Casino
3. As Good As it Gets
02 of your tv shows at the moment:
1. Law & Order SVU
2. Kevin Hill
01 person you could spend the rest of your life with:
1. Only the future knows...
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| Bye Bye Blinkie - The Apprentice |
| 11.19.04 (1:32 pm) [edit] |
I am SOOOOO glad that Maria was voted off of The Apprentice last night. I tell you for a while it was Ivana that irked me but watching Maria blink NON-STOP was annoying.
I guess I first noticed it when they did the informercial for QVC, she was blinking her eyes like a retard. I thought at the time that maybe she wore contacts or something, but she does it every single time she starts talking too much.
She really tripped me out yelling at everyone like she was damn GOD but maybe she was just PMSing?? DOUBTFUL, I just think she thought her shit didn't stink.
Wes should have slapped her before he fired her off the task,surely that may have saved his ass from being fired. I got the sense that Carol wanted to slap Maria for him.
Anyway, I guess now that things are dwindling down, I'm hoping Andy will win the whole thing. I like that kid!
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| Fingering the Clit |
| 11.15.04 (10:07 am) [edit] |
The most common misconception about fingering, is that the giver assumes the "in-out" action is pleasurable. The most pleasant sensation is derived from applying pressure to the vaginal walls; particularly the G-spot. Ask any woman if she'd prefer her lover to have a moderately thick cock, or a long thin one. 99.9% of the time, she'll opt for Stubby. (If we wanted our cervix poked, we'd go to the gyno.)
In fact, the in-out motion of a finger can become more irritating than anything. The vaginal lips are pretty sensitive, and repeat friction begins to chafe. Yes, really. Of course, fingering should occur after sufficient foreplay. There's nothing worse than some moron shoving his pointer finger up your dry pussy and poking you into submission. So guys, when your hands wander between her legs and you realize that there's more moisture in the Sahara, take the hint.)
Ok! She's wet! She's squirming! What now?? The typical woman prefers to be penetrated with 2 fingers. One is not enough (unless she is a virgin, or otherwise very tiny down there) and three is too much. Of course, use your discretion and listen to her response. You should be able to tell the difference between an uncomfortable-moan and a pleasure-moan. And if you cant, you should not be having sex.
Slide your fingers slowly between her lips, and let yourself
explore a little bit to find your bearings. If she is aroused, you should be able to feel a rough, spongy spot on the roof of her vaginal wall. Push on it. (Yes) You should be moving your fingers in a "come here" type of motion. Check your partners response to different pressures, and adjust to what makes her squeal. **
Inexperienced women might relate this new sensation to having to pee. Reassure her that she won't, unless of course she guzzled a 12 pack before you got intimate. ** Do not bother moving your finger in and out to simulate sex. She will most likely be in absolute erotic bliss just by having her g- spot pressed. Change the pace of the 'pressing' and note her reaction. Does she want it fast and hard or slow and easy? If you cant tell, ask her. We'd prefer to hear our lover say, "How do you want it, baby?" than lay there unsatisfied and frustrated. (Think about hand jobs and how annoying it is when you're being stroked slowly and delicately when you really want to be pumped like a SuperSoaker. See my point?)
If you really want to get fancy, place your thumb on her clit
while you press her g-spot. Even just letting it rest there feels good. (The clit is that little pink bump at the top of her pussy. Believe it or not, that would have turned into a penis had she a Y- chromosome. ) Your girl wont cum from this, but who cares? Most of the other women I've talked to agree with me when I say the shocking "flickers" of intense pleasure they experience are better than an orgasm anyway. The only problem is that there is no release at the end. But really, it's sexy, erotic and safe...and a great prelude to other activities that CAN bring her to orgasm, if that's what she craves...Have fun!
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| Tocarra - America's Next Top Plus Model |
| 11.10.04 (7:00 pm) [edit] |
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I was a little sad to see Tocarra booted off of ANTM tonight. She was my girl!!! I am sooooo hoping she goes on to do wonderful things and that she has a bright career!! Hopefully Ashley Stewart picks her up.
Tocarra - YOU GO GIRL!!!
Now maybe they can finally get rid of Anne or Nicole!
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| Pleasing Mr Penis |
| 11.10.04 (10:02 am) [edit] |
10.You've gotta "introduce" yourself to Willy Wonderful, i.e., "Hi! I'm(say your name) Nice to meet ya, big guy!". Don't dive on it likes it's a raw piece of meat and you're a starving pitbull! Be gentle. Stroke him nice and easy. Make friends first.
9.When (Not "IF" giving oral sex, don't suck so hard that you make an industrial vacuum cleaner appear as a dust buster and suck the man's eyeballs out of his sockets. Mr. Penis is a sensitive "guy" ya know. Be gentle. Contrary to your practicing techniques in high school, the one who "Melts" the popsicle first is not the winner.
8.When sitting on top of a man, don't move too far forward or back. Up and down is fine. What you're gonna do if you do move too far forward and back is rip Mr. Penis right off Mr. Man's crotch. Mr. Penis isn't made for that action. And, VERY important...when going up and down, if you should go up a little too high and Mr. Penis pops out, you are not a basketball net, and Willy Wonderful is not a golf
ball...your aim is not that good, and your 100 + Lbs, and this little Newton thingy called gravity will seriously injure Mr. Penis.
7.Hand jobs - When stroking a guy's dick don't grab it like a bus rail and start jerking it like you were milking a cow. Don't use the love sword as if it's a piece of gym equipment to strengthen the forearms, and remember ... when friction is the problem...lubrication is the cure.
6.Proper care of the love Tool - like any good tool you wanna keep around for a while you've gotta take good care of it just as you do your car. Wash him off after and dry him gently. Oil him frequently, and have him park in the garage as often as you can. Never bend, fold spindle or mutilate. You'll get years of use out of him that way.
5.If Mr. Penis appears uninterested, he's just being coy or stupid. That's where you have to use step #1 again. If no response, then you sure gave him a good workout the first time. Good for you !
4.Never, ever play "crush the grapes" with Mr. Penis's two friends, Mr. Balls. Nothing can make Mr. Penis shrink faster. Not even ice or a nude Pic of Angelina, Halle and Nia Long playing cards at the Naturalist beach last July.
3.If Mr. Penis can't "throw up" then his owner worked too hard on pleasing you. Be thankful. If Mr. Penis spits too soon, be proud that you had that effect on him...not everyone can have that effect on him.
2.If you don't want Mr. Penis so deep, don't say, "Shit ! Not that deep! What are you doing . . . drilling for oil??" Say, "Wow you're much bigger than I thought. Could you take it a little easier on me?" And never never say "Is it in yet?".
1.When you are done, always thank Mr. Penis. Mr. Penis has feelings, and Mr. Ego has bigger feelings. Without both of them being stroked, Mr. Ego may make Mr. Penis look for appreciation in Mr. Neighbors wife.
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| Help Me Out....Send ME This. |
| 11.02.04 (6:03 pm) [edit] |
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CHOCOLATE SUPREME!!! YUMMY!
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